Parliament’s particularly picky politicians
peddle patchy policies with performative precision,
while backbenchers bicker in brisk, bitter bursts
about budgets, borders, and broken‑bus‑routes.

Meanwhile, ministers muddle through
midnight memos and misfired mandates,
making major matters
mysteriously more muddled.

Across the aisle,
opposition orators offer oddly optimistic options,
only to wobble, waver, or wildly withdraw
when the winds of Westminster
whip the week’s narrative
into yet another
yawning, yawping,
you‑couldn’t‑make‑it‑up
U‑turn.

Try telling that to the tongue
without tying it in a constitutional knot.